Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
