Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
