Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
