The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
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SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
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So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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