I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize