He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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