Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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