This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize