I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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