i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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