Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
