I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
