She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
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You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
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I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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