Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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