Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize