Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
