i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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