So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I've blown a few things in my day
Girls should come with a carfax report
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Just invented taco cereal.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
