Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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