Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
