he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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