She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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