it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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