drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
