her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize