You made me cry and you don't even care
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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