so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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