You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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