I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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