dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
