K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
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