We're facebook friends in real life
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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