I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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