Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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