People in love make me want to vomit
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
