We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
