got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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