seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
