i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
