this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I puked a lego.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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