Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
