I want to stick my p in your. b.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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