all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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