New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Come on in and take your pants off
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
