Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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