OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
