shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
