he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
