It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize