talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
